Shadows Become Thee
by StrangerEmotion
Summary: 'That's funny-' She fainted in her chair while a thousand lights of all colors flew out from where the flame used to be. It had begun. The chaos would reign in this town. A spell switches vampires with humans. But it's never that simple, is it?
1. Magical Sabbatical

The sunlight had faded into a soft orange glow coming through the windows into the main area of the Magic Shop. Anya had already left with Xander to their flat. Buffy was out beginning early patrol, or more likely with Spike. Dawn was home with Tara. Giles was home by himself reading as well as feeling a strange familiarity in the air this night. Willow was the only one left in the Magic Shop. She came down from the top shelves with a small volume that had called to her while she was dusting up there. She laid it out on the table and quickly found all the things she needed for the first spell in the book. If it did what it claimed then they all have the power to help stop the darkness and maybe Buffy wouldn't feel the need to ignore them anymore for their own protection. At least that's the only reason Willow could think of that her best friend wasn't talking to her much anymore, and seemed so cold. She was confident it would work and then they wouldn't be so useless to Buffy anymore. What Spike had said a few years ago had always grated at her. She needed to be useful after everything Buffy had done for them. She knew Buffy would realize it after this. 'Here I go.' She lit the candle and burned the nightshade in the air in a circle around her. She tossed the magic sand onto the map of Sunnydale and spoke the words with no regret. 'That's funny-' She fainted in her chair while a thousand lights of all colors flew out from where the flame used to be. It had begun. The chaos would reign in this town.

Buffy felt strange coming to see Spike again; she really shouldn't feel so comfortable around him. She figured it was a side effect of going through digging herself out of her own grave. She knocked on his door. He opened it rather quickly; he could probably feel her like she could always feel him. It was like a buzzing sensation around the sensitive skin of her eyes, finngertips, and elsewhere. "Hey, can I come in?" She asked shyly, hating the uncertainty in her own voice. What was he doing to her?

"'Course, love. Always welcome at ol' Spike's crypt. 'S long as you aren't here to play 'Kick the Spike'." He added sardonically. He didn't seem too fazed by it though so she could only sigh in relief. She sank into one of the beaten up armchairs and waited till he took the other. She didn't want to talk this time. And he sensed that and flicked the telly back on, Passions was on. If anything could make her life feel less complicated it was watching Passions with Spike. Spike let out a yell, it wasn't as loud as he usually would though in respect for how she was feeling, and said, "Oh come on! You both know you want each other! God if you weren't actors I'd bite you already for your bloody ignorance." She snorted and said, "Really Spike?"

"Bloody right I would. Can't stand to see people do this kind of thing. Show 'em they don't have all the time in the world to beat around the bush." He wasn't making much sense anymore so she just laughed and went back to watching. She wondered how exactly he got this show with his rabbit ears and busted up piece of junk. Probably demonic assistance was involved somehow. Suddenly the power went out. Spike cursed but got quiet when he felt a strange presence in his crypt. "Love, Buffy you still here?" No answer. She was out cold. He got up and went to her chair, she was still in it. He checked her pulse, nothing. No, that can't be right, she's alive now. "Buffy, no, don't leave me again. Come back." Suddenly he saw her eyes snap open, but no they weren't her eyes, not exactly anyway. "Sire?" She asks innocently. He shakes his head. "Spike." She says finally after looking at him without her vampire face on. She seemed wistful. "You seemed different. But you aren't the one who changed, are you?"

"No, love. 'M still the same old vamp you love to hate." He said with a slightly hurt tone to his voice. To his surprise she reached out for him and grabbed his hand. "Buffy?" he asks, unsure if she was still in there now. He didn't want to have to stake her. He probably couldn't to be honest.

"Yes, are you sure you didn't bump your head on the way over here?" She said and laughingly patted him on the head. He looked into her eyes, trying to find her spark. She was still in there, but only just. He asks, "You hungry, love?"

She pouted, "Actually, no. Um, I could use a soda though."

"I meant blood, love. Can't let you eat the fair denizens of Sunnydale but I've got some pig's blood-"

"Ew, no I think I'll pass."

"What do you mean ew? I know it's not kosher but it's all I got."

"No blood at all I meant."

"Oh, wait- What?"

Buffy sighed dramatically, "Don't make me draw a picture diagram. I'm not craving the blood. Human or otherwise." He looked at her strangely. He knew she was definitely no longer with the living. 'But she would have been starving for blood. All fledges were.' He thought with a quirk of his lips, 'I was. Dru and I painted the town red that night.'

She coughed, "Anyone home? Jeeze Spike we have to figure out if this is an isolated event or-" He cut her off, roaring with laughter.

"Bloody Hell! You sound just like Soldier Boy." He added with a smirk, "Don't think he made much of an impression, personally." Instead of glaring at him like she expected, she laughed as well. She was bent over clutching her ribs from laughing so hard.

"But in all seriousness, Spike," She said after she recovered, "We should check on the others. I'm worried about Dawn."

"Right, pet. She's with Tara though," He said but she gave him a look, "You don't think Dawn or Tara have been effected too, do you? Come on, can you even imagine a vampire Glenda?"

Buffy sighed and dragged him out the door before he injured himself with his own thoughts.

Once outside they realized things were as topsy turvy as they'd ever seen them. She saw an arm trying to free itself from the soil of a fresh grave so she went over and yanked the fledge out of the soil. Only, she realized once the man was out that he wasn't dead like her. "You're alive." She stated as she listened to the man's laboured breathing and erratic heartbeat. She heard Spike snort behind her and she leveled him with a glare. 'Back to normal then,' He thought. "That's obvious, love. Why else would someone tear out of their own grave?" She counted to ten so that she wouldn't murder Spike and then waited to see what the new guy knew.

"Yeah, I am. But... I was dead. Somewhere else. It's a miracle!" The man seemed to jump for joy and she realized he was wearing priestly garb. She sighed, that would have been confusing, a vampire priest. "What kind of vampire sires a priest?" She asked to no one in particular. "Vampires?" The Priest asked her, "I don't remember any vampires. But- There was a strange woman who bit me after confessional. She was too strong, too fast. And spoke strangely."

Spike and Buffy looked at each other at the same time and thought simultaneously, 'Can you believe this idiot?' Spike put two and two together and whispered to Buffy, "It's Dru. But she hasn't sired anyone in a long time. What changed?" Buffy rolled her eyes and said, "Obviously she was lonely. Why else do vampires sire?"

Spike puffed up and said, "To build an army of undead against the slayer." Buffy just rolled her eyes and said, "Nice try." Buffy turned back to the idiot clergyman and addressed him as he was still dusting the dirt of his robes, "One thing's for certain. You can't go back to your old life now. What are you going to do?"

"Would you believe me if I said, Disneyland?" He chuckled, "I guess that'd be a bit strange as well." Buffy just sighed and then said, "Good luck with that. But I'm not sure you will be safe here, you should definitely at least head out to L.A. I have an associate there named Angel. He leads Angel Investigations. He'll help you out if anything weird happens." She handed the man a card, which caused Spike to laugh about Buffy being Angel's pimp, and turned away with Spike in tow.

It was a full ten minutes later that she entered her house on Revello Drive. Tara and Dawn were watching Scream 2 and laughing at all the corny 'scary' parts. Buffy sighed, they both seemed fine. Spike however wasn't so sure. Something seemed off. Dissonant somehow. "Hey, lil bit. Glenda." He said and leaned casually against the door frame to the living room. Tara turned to see them and they both freaked out to see that she wasn't human anymore. Her face was full on vampire face and yet she smiled as warmly and shyly as ever when she saw the two of them. "Had an eventful night, Buffy?" She asked with concern. But Buffy put herself squarely between Dawn and Tara. Buffy says dangerously, "Don't come near my sister!" Meanwhile Dawn is trying to get Buffy's attention but Buffy is ignoring her, as per usual.

Spike notices however and asks the Little Bit what's wrong. She answers, "Tara's been like that for an hour now! She hasn't tried to bite me or anything! It's weird. Something up and it smells of old Warlock." Spike nodded in agreement and got Buffy to back down from a scared Tara. "She's fine, pet. They are both fine. Tara must be like you, or close to anyway. Dawn thinks its Ethan Rayne."

"Well if Dawn thinks! I think it's Willow. She's been... The magic is taking her Spike!" She looked distressed and he patted her arm consolingly. She continued, "I've been trying to ignore it, and her because of what she did- but not now! She's put me in my grave again and now I can't ever get out."

"We'll fix it. Spike'll find a way to put everyone back in their proper human bodies. You'll see." He said as he held her, 'it is nice to feel needed like this.' She pulled Dawn and Tara in, both of them still a little confused about what Buffy meant. But he knew, she was missing Heaven and now if she stayed a vampire... Well that basically meant you were destined for hell. No matter if you fight the good fight and don't eat the humans. Even that souled poof Angel knew that, 'Why else would he be so broody?'

She pulled back reluctantly from him and the others with an embarrassed smile on her face. He loved to see this side of her. One might say he reveled in it. She asked, "Tara, do you think you can stay here with Dawn, watch out for her and the like? I have to see about the others."

Angel was tracking Drusilla to Sunnydale, he didn't really want to be here but he also didn't want her causing Buffy any problems. Buffy, the name filled him with equal parts guilt and longing. Oh yeah, and the fact that she's all buddy-buddy with Spike, that idiot, didn't help with him wanting to be here. 'Why can't the girl find some normal guy to like? If it's got to be a vampire, it should be me anyway; she's mine, rightfully.' He was waiting for the sun to go down when it happened. He felt it beat, his heart started beating again. It was like nothing else, it was evidence that he was alive. He almost forgot to breathe, but quickly came to his senses. He picked up his dark black coat, threw it over the plain white shirt, and headed to Giles'. He'd need the Watchers help on this one. "If he doesn't try to kill me first," Angel said wryly to no one in particular.

"Angelus," Rupert Giles said when the vampire was at his door, "What brings you here at," He looks at his rather old watch, "7:39 PM?"

"I need your help. Can I come in?" He asked politely, not that he needed an invitation anymore. He breathed normally and it wasn't too long before Giles noticed this.

Giles looked at him skeptically and then noticed the carotid artery in the Vampire's neck was pulsing, as if pumping blood. "What kind of game are you playing at? Trying to appear human-"

"I'm not trying to do anything! I just- I just need your help because I have a feeling others have been affected. I may be a human now but... I don't deserve it. Not yet. But other people, they could have been turned into vampires tonight. Vampires with no sire... It's not a thought I wish to have." Angel said with a shake of his head.

Giles opened the door more fully but said nothing; it was a test to prove Angel wasn't lying. He entered and closed the door behind him while Giles made them both teas. Angel asked, "Do you know how much I missed the taste of tea?" He took a sip and then set the cup down, "Doesn't taste the same without a smidge of whiskey."

"Irish," Giles said like an insult to which Angel replied, "English." They both glared a bit at the other while drinking their tea. Angel asked, "Do you even have whiskey?"

Giles looked at him sternly, "Of course not. But you are welcome to substitute it with some of my scotch." Angel made a face at that to which they both laughed. "I thought as much."

Soon there was another knock at the door and then Giles heard an unpleasant voice say loudly through the door, "Oi! Emergency here! Open up Watcher"; followed by Buffy saying something that sounded a lot like, "Shut up, Spike!" Angel and Giles both made the same exact groan of displeasure; neither of them liked Spike terribly much.

Giles opened the door and Buffy and Spike came barging in, Buffy's eyes went wide when she saw who he was entertaining and didn't quite have any idea what to say, "Angel," She said with a catch in her voice. She hadn't wanted to go see him but she had Giles tell him she was alive, and look now she wasn't! But, she knew instinctively, he was.

"Buffy-" Spike had run forward and punched Angel in the nose only to fall backwards himself with a splitting migraine, "Ow! What 'da 'ell, Spoik?" Angel said whilst clutching his probably broken nose.

Spike just laughed like a basket case. "Well, he's human, but not any prettier to look at." Angel glared at him and Buffy looked at Angel incredulously, that was the same look she gave Spike when- 'Whoa that's so not a thought you wanna be having, Buffy.' "Yeah I got that Spike, my senses aren't that dull." She said to distract herself from the image of the two of them- 'Stop these thoughts!'

Spike smirked when he noticed her faint blush, 'Oh yeah, I'm good.' He thought and while she was looking, looked between Angel and her and rolled his tongue behind his teeth. She blushed a little more, which made him wonder where in hell she got the blood to do that and turned her attention to Giles.

"Spike and I have checked on everyone else besides you and Willow, we couldn't find her. We know she was in the Magic Box but... She must have left. Xander is a vampire and I'm not sure if anything much is off about him, Anya apparently is a vampire with a soul, sans brooding, Dawn's human still and Tara apparently wants demon blood to snack on. As for myself, I'm also a vampire now but apparently I don't need or want blood and can walk into whatever domain I feel like. That about sums it up. Oh wait! We think Drusilla is back in town." She finished and plopped down onto the couch with Spike following soon after; if only to prevent Angel from getting to her first.

Giles cleaned his glasses and said dryly, "Indeed. Well, Angel has also been affected. Oppositely, one might say-"

"Giles, we really don't have time for this. Do you know of any spell that could do this?" Buffy asked with a hopeful expression.

He sighed, "No, I'm afraid not. But I do believe I sensed Willow doing the spell. And earlier I had the strange feeling that Ethan Rayne is back in town."

Spike snorted and said, "It's a bloody reunion. I just hope Darla is still dust-"

Buffy smacked him upside the head and said, "Don't Jinx it!" Buffy then turned back to Giles, who had taken seat in an uncomfortable looking armchair. "We figured those two were involved, especially when we couldn't find Willow. I doubt Rayne's going to stick around to watch the show this time. He must have learned by now, don't you think?"

Giles sighed and said, "No, he never learns. Not even when he's put in mortal danger. I've tried stressing to him that I don't want to see him in Sunnydale. But he always comes back."

"Well, that settles it. I just need to go out there and find him. Beat him up a bit and he'll tell me how to fix this." She said and made to leave. Spike and Angel both got up to follow her. She sighed and gestured for Angel to sit back down. "Angel, stay here with Giles. It's not safe right now for you to be out of doors." Spike gave him a smug smile and flounced out the door behind Buffy.

"Why'd it have to be me, Giles?" Angel asked semi rhetorically.

Giles handed him a glass of scotch and said emotionlessly, "Be thankful she's still mostly herself. She could have killed us both. I know Spike wouldn't have stopped her."

Angel took a large gulp, to which Giles raised his brow with some contempt, and said, in a depressed voice, "Only too true."

Drusilla was very happy that she'd gotten a replacement for that lovely priest she'd snacked on. She gleefully let the red headed vampire tear through the streets, eating everyone she could. "Such appetite! But save room for dessert, I have special cakes for you and Mummy will be displeased if you don't finish them all!" She swayed to and fro and giggled singing an old folk tune that her Mummy used to sing her. "No more sunshine! It's all darkness and stars! The moon is turning red...." She growled and dragged the red head inside a nearby mausoleum. "Wait here. The sun will rise soon and we don't want our dresses to get ruined! Then we couldn't have the dessert."

Willow nodded and climbed inside a sarcophagus, curling around the current occupant. "I won't leave bones for them to find me by."

Drusilla slipped into another empty one and sang the song her mother used to sing until she went to sleep. She ignored the young vampire crying herself to sleep.

Willow cuddled the dry bones and sucked on the blood crusting around her lips, 'They tasted better going down. Now they're in my head. It hurts.' She cried and clutched her head, the blood on her fingers going into her hair. 'Why does it hurt?'

Spike was forced to stay with Buffy and Tara in the basement while it was sunny outside. They figured it'd be safer to stick together. They fell asleep sometime around noon after watching television and playing cards. Spike was the first up, he needed far less sleep then they did as new vampires. He went upstairs and heated up a bag of blood in his customary mug. He smiled slightly remembering when he'd been chained up in that tub. It was a terrible time for the most part, except for when she'd been there. He'd convinced himself back then that the reason he'd looked forward to her coming over was she was a worthy verbal opponent and the fact that she'd give him more blood then Giles could stomach to give him helped. She was just so alive back then. He'd been only too happy to bask in it while he could. He was such an idiot, he realized later, when he'd betrayed her to that hunk of junk Adam. 'I helped a bit in the end though.'

She pranced upstairs behind him and grabbed a diet coke, making a face at his half a mug of cooling blood. "Might want to get to that before the next Ice Age," she said and poked him in the ribs, "I'm not rich enough for you to not finish what you take."

He chuckled and drank the last bit quickly, his face going instinctively bumpy. He looked at her with his yellow eyes to see she'd also gotten bumpy. "See something you like, love?" He smirked and bared his fangs while doing his trademark tongue curl.

"Gross Spike! I am so not attracted to you while you are like that!" She said, not realizing she had given away a bit more then she had intended.

He leaned forward, backing her against the fridge, and said, "But you are attracted to me, then." He turned his head and moved as if to suck her blood but stopped at her ear. "Tell me no and I'll stop." He licked and nibbled on her seductively. He wasn't in any rush. She didn't keep silent for long and he could hear her biting her lip to keep from making too much noise. He licked a particularly sensitive part of her neck, where her pulse would have been, and asked while pulling away to stare into her eyes, "How about now, still not attracted to me?" His yellow eyes focused on her intently.

He didn't get to hear her answer though as Tara came up the stairs at just that moment, "Who's ready to k-kill some demons? I got bored waiting for you guys to stop f-fooling around."

Spike looked pretty abashed for an evil vampire. Buffy straightened her skirt reflexively, even though she was wearing leather pants today and said, "Sure Tara, you sure you want to come? It's pretty hectic out there. I'm trying to make sure I'm not killing anyone vampire or otherwise until we can figure this out and get it reversed. Mostly, we're going to go out looking for Willow." Tara actually pouted at that.

"Don't worry Glenda, I'm sure we'll find a nice demon snack for you." Spike said to which Tara brightened up. It worried Spike that she wasn't worried about Willow; he guessed she really didn't care about her now that she'd gone through the change. Or perhaps she was angry Willow had had a hand in this mess. Either way, they needed Tara to help with bringing Willow back to fix what she broke. He only hoped his intuition was wrong and she wasn't with Drusilla. It'd be a bitch of a time getting Red away from Dru, who was always very protective of new pets.

"Right, let's go." Buffy said with a slight tremor in her voice. She exited out the back door with Tara and Spike following behind her. She so needed to find Willow and fast if she wanted to keep her distance from Spike.

Meanwhile Spike was thinking they needed to find Willow before Dru did. As well as thinking that the slayer really needed to wear leather pants more often. He pulled his eyes back up to look around a bit, not that eyes were vitally important in the dark. In truth he relied primarily on his hearing, it didn't work as well on other vampires, experienced ones in any case. But he just might hear Red breathing erratically after killing some dumb human. "We should... look for where there is trouble. She'll be at its center. I always pegged her to have a real whimsy and talent for death."

Buffy glared at him, but he could tell she knew he was right. She was just worried for the girl. "Spike, you barely even know her. I'm one of her best friends-"

He scoffed, "Fat lot of good that did ya. Witch needs to learn magic has consequences. Maybe dying will have gotten it through that head of hers."

She barely spared him a glance as she busted into yet another crypt, hoping to find Willow. She sighed, no one was home. "This is a total bust. I guess we can try your idea."

Spike stiffened, someone had been here, maybe 15 minutes ago. "Dru was here. And, Gods, so was Willow. She cried a lot when she was around me... kind of used to the smell of her tears now. You know that sounded just as weird in my head as out of it."

Buffy sniffed too, she definitely noted a certain amount of Willow odor. It wasn't until he said anything that she noticed. "And now I'm officially weirded out. As soon as we get her back she going on a serious magical sabbatical." She sniffed a bit more, "There was quite a bit of blood on her too... Not her own though. Bleh."

Spike smiled slightly before realizing that humans dying, probably not something to smile about. Even if you were right about someone's vampire personality. He put on his best stern face and shoved his hands in his jeans to keep from picking up where he'd left off in the kitchen. Although he didn't see the big deal about it, he wanted to show her he was willing to adapt. Plus, it was only a matter of time before she would see she was meant to be with him in the night. And then she'd be only too willing to- Hold up there! Mission time, focus. "We should go to the Bronze."

"Spike, we don't have time for a drink!" She looked exasperated with him and he could only chuckle and wait for her to connect the dots. "Oh right... I'm still an idiot; yeah that's where the people are. Walking, talking happy meals and all. Come on, this place is dull."

Tara piped in, "Well, it IS a crypt."

The Bronze was packed with people and vampires alike. And who knew how many humans were originally vampires and vice versa. It was a PR nightmare. If Spike actually cared about such things, which he didn't, as if reading his mind Buffy said, "Look, don't kill any vampires unless you have to. We are here for Willow."

Tara spotted her first, grinding against Dru provocatively in a sea of other bodies. She squeaked and turned away from the sight, understandable considering. Spike brought the two girls with him to speak with Dru. They had little trouble a most were inebriated humans, easy to push out of the way. "New pet, love?"

Dru turned her dark eyes on him and growled a bit. "You've been naughty, Spike. No cakes for you." He restrained from growling at her in turn, the woman was mental. He used to really love it, but now... Who was he kidding; all the women he was into were bloody nutcases. The whole screeching evasive lot of them; but he needed them around, so that he wouldn't be alone.

"Willow, you did this you know that right?" He asked softly, "You can take it back, reverse it." She looked at him with equal parts hope and despair.

"Fix me, I'm broken. All- all loose threads and I keep stitching the cloth together but my hands are wet with their blood. Help me, Spike. It hurts now. Their voices, they call me unclean. Make them stop." She whimpered and sucked on the blood on her hands like a child would of sweet covered fingers. She pulled away from Dru, who looked really put out and tried to hit Tara who stepped up to protect Willow from the older vampire.

"These are my girls, Dru. You don't touch them." He said and punched her out. Thankfully she hadn't been turned into a human so he was pain free. He led them out while Dru was still unconscious. He didn't want to go against his sire in a full out battle. He wasn't that foolish. He stole a glance at Buffy who was laughing quietly, "Spike, that was the worst sucker punch in history."

He laughed too while Tara let Willow cling to her for comfort. It wasn't the perfect moment but for Spike it felt very close.

Soon the entire Scooby Gang, and a few more besides, was gathered in Giles' apartment. Giles', Willow, and Tara were getting the magicks going while Buffy was eyeing up Spike in a naughty way. 'Damn it must be me being a vampire myself... It'll all blow over once they fix this. Right and pigs will fly which, on the Hellmouth, is probably not the most unlikely thing to happen.' Spike took that exact moment to look back, curling his tongue provocatively at her. All thoughts of pigs flew out the window.

"You are so going to be even more damned if you don't stop that." She said threateningly. At least she thought it sounded great in her mind. Her voice had other plans and made her sound more coy than killer. Good thing he wasn't likely to kill her either, at least not tonight.

So wrapped up was she in making eye contact love to Spike that she didn't notice the small light reenter her chest. And then she realized, it didn't matter that he wasn't all good. She wasn't either truth be told. He was trying; even without a soul he was trying to be a good man. But she couldn't do this to him; make him do it only for her. She dragged him bodily out of Giles' Apartment while the rest were still recovering from their re humanizing. "I don't love you." She said plainly.

"I know, pet. But a man has to try don't he? You are everything to me." He spoke in that way of his that made her insides turns gooey.

"But... I do care about you. You deserve to find out what being good really means without looking over your shoulder wondering if I'm going to come along and smack you on the nose for every wrong move." She was trying really hard to make this easy and pain-free.

"Are you?" He looked incredulous as he said, "Are you breaking up with me?"

"Technically-" She started to say but even in her own ears it sounded harsh. Brittle. The words wouldn't come. She felt bad, guilty; he wouldn't feel this bad for her.

"Right, then. Remind me next time not to go to the sodding trouble of cleaning up after Red. Some things are better off left done." He looked like he didn't care but if she had learned one thing about Spike, and that would be an understatement; it was that he did care. He cared a lot more than some humans she'd known. Like Ben, which by the by she hadn't seen since the whole Glory thing. Strangely she wasn't too worried that some nasty might have made him its dinner.

"Spike, it's not so bad we can still-"

"If you bloody even think of finishing that sentence I'll end you." He said while getting up close to her face.

"I suppose not... Mortal enemies again, then? Since we seem to be on threatening terms." She asked with a shade too much enthusiasm. Inside she felt it though, it was wrong to do this. But nothing was right anymore, if it ever was.

"This can't be as easy for you as you are making it out to be." He said holding himself back just barely from crawling on his knees, begging her not to do this. "I finally have you back, alive again. I did it for you. But more importantly for me. I need you Slayer, alive and well and kicking."

"You don't though, you need perspective... And as long as I'm in the picture, your whole world will revolve around me." She said quivering slightly as he leaned in closer.

"You are the sun Buffy. Even in the darkest night you light the way. Is it so bad to want that?" He asked.

"Only if you are a vampire with a nasty allergy to sunlight."

"I'll burn up knowin' I was the closest thin' to happy I'll ever know."

"I can't let you." She said pulling away from him.

He nodded, seeming to take some invisible cue she hadn't sent out. "I'll wait until you will. You are the one I would wait an eternity for..." And he tried to leave, people really needed to stop saying poignant things and leaving her to stew.

"You are an idiot, you do realize this right?" She said while pulling him around into her. "You don't get to do cool walk away, for one thing it's nearly dawn."

"For the other?"

She kissed him sweetly; it was slow and unrushed, as if the sun couldn't touch them. She pulled away first and said, "For second, I was lying when I said we could be enemies. I need you here, dead but not dusty and most certainly kissing me." It was enough for now. There would be time enough for plans and arrangements after the coming storm.

They both came back in and waited whatever admonishments were to be inevitably made. Giles did not disappoint. "I'm glad you both could join us. We still need to decide what to do with Ethan Rayne. I can't have him tied up in my tub for weeks like Spike," He looked a cross between amused and exasperated. "It was bad enough the first time."

Spike, leaning against the stair post, said, "Feelin's mutual, Rupes," He gave Buffy a cocky grin, "Though some parts weren't half bad."

She sighed and did her best to quell the butterflies in her stomach. He was ungodly good at making her feel like a giggly schoolgirl. "Right, the part where you almost got a crossbow bolt to the groin was a particular highlight."

He blanched, "You're right. I hate this place."

Meanwhile Giles' was trying not to have a fit. Angel spoke up, "No one's keeping you here, Spike." Most everyone was in agreement. At least all the males were, the females however stood up to him. Dawn in particular.

"Just so we're clear. I'm against you being back in town again." Her little sister spoke fiercely, "So don't begin to act like your opinion still matters. You left her; you don't get to use the jealous boyfriend card when you were the one who gave up on her."

"Dawn-" Buffy began to say but her sister just turned to look at her with that determined look that all Summers' women share.

"It's true Buffy." She turned back to glare at Angel. "I trust Spike more than this pillock. And he doesn't even have a soul. What does that say about his quality as a person?"

Buffy was shocked her sister would so vehemently dislike Angel. "Dawn, that's enough. I think he gets the point." 'And what's a pillock?'

Dawn looked surprisingly hateful, "Not yet, he hasn't." She turned to give her sister a hug. Dawn must have gotten it out of her system because she smiled politely to Angel after that. Teenagers are so temperamental. 'Oh my god, I've become Mom!' She shared a private smile with Spike as the rest debated very loudly what to do about Ethan Rayne. She heard Giles cough and look pointedly at her, clearly her word was necessary to resolve this matter. "I don't care; toss him into a nest of vampire bitches. Though, come to think of it, he might like that."

Giles immediately began rubbing his glasses furiously. Clearly recounting his own close encounter with the horny damned. "Indeed, but let's not be too quick to discount that as an option."

"What I want to know is how he got out from under the initiative's grasp." Spike said while giving the hallway to the bathroom a contemplative glance.

Buffy nodded and said, "Or what they left behind in him."

"They wouldn't chip a human, Buffy. They were strictly testing on demons I'm sure." Giles assured her.

"They wanted to do some nasty tests on me, Giles. And I was just as human as anyone else. And remember the debacle with Oz?" She looked to the door. "I'm going to ask the man himself."

Ethan Rayne looked up with that eerie smile on his face when she came in. He made no move to struggle in his chains. That's what she liked to see. "Gonna stay gone if we let you go, Ethan? Or am I going to have to feed you to Spike?"

"I'd like to see him try. He's neutered, or so I've heard." Rayne smirked behind her; presumably Spike followed her to the interrogation room. Spike stayed quiet at that to her surprise.

"Yeah... But he can eat you once you're dead. My Spike has been feeling quite peckish lately." She said in a tone eerily reminiscent to Drucilla. She knew it would frighten the man.

"You aren't still suffering from my spell, are you Slayer?" He asked looking slightly worried. "I thought Rupert would have fixed it right away, the spoilsport."

She leaned closer, staring him down. "I don't need fangs to take you out. You've worn out you're get out of jail free cards. I say the word and any of them will take you out in the most brutal ways you can imagine. And some you can't." Spike leaned into her and put his hands on her shoulders in a sign of protection.

"I would gladly endure the pain to snap your neck personally. And don't worry; I wouldn't eat you, to mature for my tastes." Spike said and rubbed her stiff muscles in a counterpoint to his vicious words.

"Mmmm. Right, so are you prepared to speak or should I kill you now?" She sounded very relaxed for a person making death threats.

"I'll tell you. Whatever you need to know." He said, clearly frightened beyond proper speech. She wondered if she smacked him if he would turn into a gibbering mess.

She stepped out of Spike grasp lest she become incoherent herself. "First, I want to know how you got away from the initiative. Then I want to know why you came back to Sunnydale when everyone has made it painfully clear that if you do come back your time will be cut short. Speak."

"They let me go. Said they had no room for me, that I would be of no use to them locked up with the 'animals'. I guess they think nothing of what a human can do. Blinded fools. But I took them up on their offer and left. Your boyfriend, Riley, walked me out. Didn't he ever tell you that? Must have slipped his mind." Rayne smirked in his usual way, certain he could weasel his way out of trouble.

"Is that all?" She gave him a cold look, "If you thought mentioning Riley would help you... Well, you were dead wrong." She left the room with Spike following and motioned for Giles to do his best. She had had enough with negotiating with the coward. She needed a spot of violence and some alone time with her favourite vampire. "Let's go. Cya guys, I'm going to patrol." Angel followed, like she thought he would. She let him, he would leave soon anyway and there were quite a few things she needed to clear up between them.

A/N: So, what'd you guys think? Want more or should I leave it as is? The choice is yours to make. Reviews feed the beast, and that's a good thing.


	2. The Aftermath

Shadows Become Thee

The Aftermath

The cemetery was quiet and still. 'Peaceful,' Buffy thought, 'Except for them.' Spike and Angel were following after her side by side; neither would let the other be closer to her. It was ridiculous. She had planned to just tell Angel to please go to L.A. But she didn't want to give Spike any ideas. She couldn't be with him, not when she could not fully trust him. It wasn't his fault exactly; it was just how it was. But rehashing things with Angel was also an unbearable concept. She really, really, really just wanted it to be over for them. It would make it easier to be able to see things between her and Spike more clearly. Though she felt things were as clear right now as it ever got between them. She stopped at her mother's grave and sank her leather clad knees into the grass near the cold headstone. 'So much suffering... To be with you again,' She let loose a solitary tear and someone's cold finger took it from her face. 'I live for Dawn now... I want to live for myself.'

"Ponce. Let her cry, she needs it." Spike whispered scruffily with a bit of pain in his own voice. She heard Angel scuffle back and rest his back against a tree.

"Spike?" She asked with her hand over the now flat resting place of her mom. She shouldn't have come here so soon, it made her feel weak.

"Yeah, love?" He kneeled next to her and looked to her. He wanted to know what she needed; he wanted so much from her that she didn't know she could give again.

"I feel like I'm in love with death right now. Want to have that fight?" She looked at him with despair. She was so far away from heaven these days. He could give her a quick end.

"I couldn't hurt you Buffy. Never. Not even if I wanted to... Which is never happening. Got it? I'd do anything else for you, anything." He said, forgetting Angel was still listening intently.

She smiled a broken smile, "You've done enough for me. More than I ever asked of you. You didn't have to stick around after Glory, but you did. You couldn't have been doing it for me. I was dead. Who did you do it for Spike?"

He looked a little embarrassed but answered truthfully, "I did it for her and for you. Even if your body was gone... I knew your soul Buffy; where else would you have gone? I wanted to make sure you knew I'd always protect her. Always." He pulled her into a leaning hug with one arm and picked at the grass near her mom's grave. "I also did it for Joyce. She should have been around to see Lil Bit grow up and go off to college... Get married in one of those old churches. Joyce deserved to be there. The least I could do was make sure Dawn grew up alright, not too scarred for life, yeah?"

She sniffled; she knew exactly what he meant about Dawn. Her mom should have been resurrected, she was the strong one. "Yeah. She would know what to say right now. Even if I never asked for her guidance in life... I want it so much now that she's gone. She might say: Buffy, life goes on. You will too. Do the right thing and you can never go wrong."

He smiled into her golden hair and said with a bit of restrained laughter. "Or she'd just fix us some of her killer hot chocolate and talk about other things to get your mind off of death. She was always good at that. Always made me feel right at home."

She looked behind her with curiosity, Angel was gone.

"Typical." Spike said noticing what she had, "Let's get you home with Dawn. I'll try to make you a cuppa myself."

They left the cemetery a lot lighter in the heart. She walking right beside him, wanting to hold his hand but cursing herself for feeling that way.

"Go on! Try it on already!" Anya screeched and handed her the ugliest dress she'd ever had the misfortune of seeing, let alone wearing.

"It's lovely. We'll put them on right away. Right, Wills?" She nodded encouragingly to her red headed best friend. She was just now coming out of her shell.

When Anya left Willow asked her in a slightly unsure voice, "Think she'd notice if I charmed it to be a little less... green?" They laughed quietly, knowing Anya was in the room adjacent to the one they were in. They dressed quickly and headed out to find Xander. Buffy saw Spike hiding by the potted plants, he was alone. She nodded to Willow to go find Xander and headed over to Spike.

"I thought you were going to stay at your crypt?" She asked in a tone that suggested she wasn't entirely happy with him coming.

"Yeah," He looked embarrassed as he rubbed the back of his neck and looked appraisingly at her dress. "Didn't want me to see you in that?" He smirked and gave her a lascivious look. "It's just a dress, Buffy."

She sighed, she knew that but it didn't help her stop feeling a bit mortified at having him see her in it. "Hopefully I won't have to be in it for long," He gave her a look which she tried her best to ignore and continued, "You know what I mean. Just need to find Xander and get this party started."

"The whelp? I saw him enter that room over there," He pointed to what looked like a closet door next to the caterer's trolley. "He was with an old man." She left Spike and opened the door to see Xander zoning out over a crystal ball. She did a drop kick and broke the thing. Xander snapped out of it and looked at the man with a deep rage.

"You are NOT me. Whatever you just showed me is a lie. I know I might not make her happy... But you won't make me run away from her." Xander punched the old man in the nose and ran out the door. Buffy ran after him to see him enter Anya's dressing room.

"XANDER!!!" Anya screamed. Then went quiet.

Spike appeared next to her, keeping to the shadows. She noticed then that she was doing the same. "Trouble in paradise, eh? Can't say I'm surprised. So, want to go to Willie's after this?"

She turned around exasperated with him, "Spike, is this really the time to be asking me out on a date?"

He gave her a half smile and leaned against the wall. "What can I say? Love is in the air." She laughed at his antics and slapped his arm playfully.

"Don't tempt me. I haven't saved the life of enough kittens lately." She pouted. The way he looked at her then made her want to leave with him immediately. She turned back to stare at the door.

"They'll be alright, love, maybe not together, but it their business." He said wisely. She saw Willow and waved her over.

Willow smiled at the both of them. She was a lot more trusting of Spike after the vampire changing incident. "Hey guys. Some wedding, huh?"

Ten minutes later, Xander and Anya both came out of the room in normal clothes. Anya smiled and went up to the front where a mic stood. She began to speak, "My friends, there has been a change of plans. Xander and I have talked it over and we are going to wait. Give each other more time to decide if we want a lifetime commitment. Don't worry; we can still have a wedding dinner. Don't want to waste all the food." She smiled through teary eyes and went back to hold Xander's hand. There would be time to work things out between them. That is, unless another apocalypse came and actually killed them all. In that case, it wouldn't matter much then either.

Several of the human guest became very angry, particularly Xander's dad. "I paid for tha' booze an' dere's na' gonna be a weddin'? Hell, might haf told me sooner. Coulda gotten sloshed alone."

Xander clenched his fist, the one not holding Anya's hand, he was angry enough at the man from before but his dad was another story. He could only grind his teeth and glare as chaos erupted around them. Demons began fighting with humans, he heard Spike chuckling in the corner as Buffy tried to stop the fighting. He tugged on Anya's hand. They both escaped out of the back, not to be seen for a few weeks.

Buffy put down the receiver and faced the gang, sans Anya and Xander, she said, "That was Xand... He and Anya went to Vegas and are coming back tomorrow."

Willow and Tara just kept quiet, Dawn couldn't, "So. They get hitched Vegas style? Oooh, is Anya pregnant?"

Spike shook his head, "Don't be daft, Dawn." He smirked and looked to Buffy to gauge her reaction on what he would say next, "Xander's the pregnant one. Knocked 'im up meself."

Buffy rolled her eyes and said, "Take a cue from the others, both of you." She pointed to the quiet faces of Tara and Willow.

Spike snorted, "They are only quiet because they are talking sexy to each other in their minds."

Both Willow and Tara went bright red and said loudly, "Are not!" Spike smirked, he loved to see the two birds being cute together. Not that he'd ever admit it. Well, unless he was plastered. Can't help what comes out of his mouth then.

Buffy looked a little peeved as she pointed at Dawn, "Innocent ears here, Spike. Try not to corrupt my sister beyond repair."

He gave her his best offended look, "Don't know what you are going on about. Your sister is the one who corrupted me. I'd look out for this one. Next Big Bad in the making. I'd know a thing or two about it."

"Right, like that time you got chased off by my mother." She gave him a dismissive look, "Real evil one you are." They all, except Spike, shared a laugh at his expense.

He stood up, possibly actually offended now, "I am evil. Evil, soulless undead, remember?" He pouted, she laughed while tears came to her eyes.

"Right, how could I forget, Mr. Big Bad." She taunted him. It was fun to taunt him into storming out. He'd always come back though. This time he didn't storm out, instead he pulled her forcibly into the kitchen and down into the basement.

He backed her into the wall by the cot and said threateningly, "Listen well, Slayer. I'm not your personal punching bag. Apologize or I'll show you just how bad I can get."

The wall was very uncomfortable and so was his knee propping her up against it. "Your chip. You can't do anything to me."

He tilted his head, saying, "It must kill you inside how much you really want me to though, doesn't it?" He grabbed her arms a little more firmly; it would pinch a bit but wouldn't actually hurt her. "I will find a way to get to you, Slayer. I always do."

She lunged forward and bit his neck. "No, Spike. You won't. You can never get to me." His blood in her mouth, she spit it on his shoes. "You never change. For a second there, I almost believed it possible, thanks for clearing that up for me. Now, get out of my house."

Enraged he blindly punched her in the face. She was thrown back into the wall. He didn't even notice that his chip didn't fire. He shouted, "Me? What about you? You sanctimonious... You know what... I don't need this." He stormed out, more importantly, she let him.

She wiped his blood off her face, finally realizing all that had occurred. 'For one, Spike's chip is broken. For the other, I caused him to hit me. I wanted him to do it. To make it easier to push him away.' She stomped back upstairs to the shocked faces of the others and said, "I need a disinvite on the house."

Willow looked confused, "But... Spike's the only one-"

"Just do it, please Wills? No questions. I need a change of clothes... and a bath. Then I'm going to go patrolling for a particular demon." She plodded upstairs, still a bit uncertain on her feet.

She found him at Willy's and thought, 'Well that was easy. Sometimes the evil undead is in the first place you look.' She didn't even have to sneak up on him; he was absolutely surrounded by bottles and empty glasses. He blearily looked up at her and then groaned, pounding out another shot. "Here to kill me then? Makes sense, I'm just like the rest of them to you..."

She knocked all the glasses on the table to the floor and grabbing the back of his jacket, she banged his head into the table... hard. The barman's protests might as well been silent for all she cared or noticed them. "HOW-" Pound, "DARE-" Pound, "YOU-" Pound and then she pulled him up to stare him in the eye, much as it hurt to even see him like this she was so furious she continued, "Just leave after doing something like that?"

His eyes rolled around in his skull but he managed to grouse out, "Like wha-?" She sighed; he wasn't sober enough for her to actually get the answers she needed. She hauled him off the stool and out the door. She'd pulled him all the way to his crypt, most of the time he was speaking gibberish, and threw him into his comfy chair. When he tried to get up to get more liquor, she punched him in the nose and said, "Stay put. Sleep it off."

He slurred, "Yesh Ma'am," and passed out.

Spike woke with the mother of all headaches. He reached for the flask in his jacket then realized he was stripped. He only had his jeans on and was tucked into his bed downstairs. He turned over to see Buffy coming down the stairs with a bottle of water and some aspirin. He doubted she realized such medicine had no effect on him. "Those won't help." He said gruffly.

She smiled a little too brightly and said, "I know. They are for me." She popped a couple in her mouth and took a large sip of the water, smacking her lips loudly when she finished. He grimaced. "Ready to talk about what happened last night?"

He jumped out of bed and began putting his clothes back on. He didn't feel like letting her ogle him and berate him at the same time. Midway through slipping into his shirt he said, "I'd rather not. If it's all the same to you."

She pushed him into his dresser and said looking absolutely furious, "It's really not, Spike. You hit me." His first thought was 'She's so beautiful when she's angry.' But he said instead, "You hit me all the time. Don't see me crying about it."

She backed off a bit after that, "Spike, that's... It's not the same. You hit me last night but the chip didn't go off." She threw the bottle on the bed and crossed her arms, looking very much like she was scolding him.

He smiled, remembering it now. "Yeah, I did, didn't I? What d'ya make of that?" He wasn't thinking about the consequences, she was however.

"I don't know. But you aren't invited at my house until we figure this out." She said simply. To him, it felt just like a door had just come crashing between them. "I can't risk the safety of my friends. I know I could take you but I won't risk them getting hurt in the crossfire."

He snarled, "That punch wasn't meant to hurt you. I was just striking out after YOU bit me."

She raised one eyebrow and said smartly, "I hope the irony of that was not lost on you." He grudgingly smiled a little before resuming his defensive position. "In any case, I can't risk them. Not even for you."

He smiled slightly, "A year ago, hell a month even, you wouldn't have come by to tell me this. I would have had to find out myself. Could it be-" He began to ask her that which she could not answer.

"No, it's not. At least, I don't think it is." She looked worried about this, perhaps she had been thinking about it before. "I don't love you. I don't think I could ever come to a place or time where that would even be possible. But-"

"Yeah, love?" He asked, hoping she would give him something he could work with. That maybe he had a chance in hell of getting her to love him.

"But," She sighed looking at him finally and uncrossing her arms. "But I care for you. Even that seems crazy to me right now. How I could allow myself to care for you when, in all likelihood, you will kill again..."

He scooped her up into his arms, she allowed it. He sighed with contentment. "Buffy, I would do anything for you. If you told me to..."

She leant back and looked him square in the eyes, "And that's why, Spike. You would do anything for me. Don't think I don't relish that some moments. But I worry that that's all it would ever be. You would only be following me, not making the decision to do good yourself."

He sighed, "Is that what it takes? Me having my own personal moral compass? I have one Buffy. I do. I know what's right and what's wrong. I might not always act upon it but... I'm not much known for my clear thinking."

She shook her head and pulled out of his embrace. "You just don't get it. You might know the difference but you don't feel it. It's not a gut instinct for you to save someone. It's the exact opposite. You still revel in being evil. It's the part of you that I can't stand. You only do good things because of your attachment to me. Your love of me makes you see doing good as the way to get me to love you when doing good should be a given."

He wanted to be able to deny it. He couldn't. "And what would you have me do? Get a soul. Style my hair up in front. Walk around like a great big, brooding bat?"

She collapsed onto his bed and put her hands in her lap. He noticed she was crying. "I- I don't know what I want. I've just been going through the motions these past few months. I can't begin to tell you what would make me happy. I just don't know, Spike. But I do know that anything between us is a train wreck waiting to happen. We both know that."

"No," he said, "I have to hope that someday you will feel the same as I do. When I look at you, Buffy, nothing else matters."

She looked devastated, "Well, that's the problem then." She stood, kissed him on the cheek, and left. 'Train wreck? What would she know.' He left that night, a man with a mission.

Anya hopped out of the car, Xander in hot pursuit, and knocked cheerily on the Summers' front door. Dawn answered it, "Hey guys! Buffy's a little busy right now. But you can make yourselves at home." They stepped inside to hear loud banging going on upstairs amidst various colorful curses.

Dawn looked a bit embarrassed but showed them into the living room, plopping back into the couch. "Might as well watch this show with me... She's going to be awhile." Dawn stuffed some chips in her mouth and continued, "Umm, Are you guys hitched now?"

Xander fielded that question, "No, Dawnie, we aren't." Anya added, "But we had plenty of sex. Even once on a slot machine."

Dawn choked out, "Eww. TMI."

Buffy came down fully clothed, 'Unlike the last time,' Dawn thought and shuddered. "Oh, hey Anya, Xander. Back so soon?"

Xander smiled, "Had to come back to keep my job. Oh, and to make sure nothing happened to my girls."

Buffy raised her eyebrow at that. "I'm not going to have to start calling you Daddy, am I?" She smiled when he groaned with mortification.

Anya gave a private grin but blessedly kept her mouth shut. Xander recovered and asked, "So, what was all that upstairs about."

She groaned, "I lost my favourite, um, pairofpanties." She rushed the last bit in her embarrassment. She had mostly figured that Spike must have them and she was going over later tonight to get them back. With violence. Thankfully no one gave her grief about her briefs and they changed to a more suitable subject, Xander and Anya's impromptu vacation.

"You are SO dead!" she said, knocking down his door. Clem nearly had a heart attack, spilling his bowl of popcorn everywhere. She looked past him with a guilty smile and asked more calmly, "Have you seen Spike? I need to kill him."

Clem shook his head and said genially, "He left last night, Slayer. Said he had some business to take care of. I'm watching over his place but if you need anything else just ask." She walked past him and went down to the basement level, searching up and down for her black thong. 'Great, he has the foresight to take my panties when he leaves but not to even tell me he's leaving.' She cracked down the center and barely made it to his bed before she crumbled. To add insult to injury Clem soon came downstairs and tried vainly to comfort her. 'He's finally gone. And now I want him back.'

"Hey now, he'll be back. Otherwise he wouldn't have asked me to watch the crypt. He seemed really upset when he left. You two kids have a fight again?" Clem asked congenially.

She sniffled into the pillow, her hand clenched tight with emotion. "Yeah, it's what we do," She sat up after she felt more composed and said, "I need to go." She got up shakily while he looked on, worried about her no doubt. She put on her best smile and headed back to her own house. 'I could do with a Java Chip right about now.' She thought. All of her senses seemed dull, she felt numb. She didn't even notice the vampire lurking in the shadows.

* * *

A/N: I'd love to know what you all think so far. So drop me a line! :D


	3. Chasing the Sun

Shadows Become Thee

Chasing the Sun

The blond vampire found himself going to Los Angeles. That was as far away as he got from Sunnydale before running out of gas. He was currently drinking in a demon bar near to where his stolen motorcycle was parked. He threw back another shot and tried to stop the nagging feeling that he was forgetting something. "Hey good lookin'," Another patron eyed him up, he ignored her. "You look familiar."

He finally turned to the slag to give her a piece of his mind when he realized he didn't even care to do that. He smiled at her and said, "Know what, love? I've got a boat to catch and I don't fancy talking to old enemies." He paid his tab and walked out. In a matter of days he would be on the other side of the world from here.

"That was William the Bloody, you asinine girl. Of course he looked familiar." A pregnant blond said.

"And who are you, human?"

The blond smiled eerily, "My name is Darla."

"Tara, Amy's missing and her cage is smashed." Willow shouted, dragging Tara into their room. Dawn soon came rushing in to see what the shouting was all about.

"Nothing else is taken or broken. Well, except one of my focusing crystals. Huh," Tara said as she looked in their closet. "And my green dress."

Willow looked at Tara, worried. "You don't think she was turned too?"

Dawn laughed, "Oh come on, Vampire Rat? Like that would ever happen."

"No but maybe the reversal spell reverted all changes." Tara said, "One thing's for certain, I'm getting my clothes back from that thief if she's human again."

Buffy came into the room toweling her hair dry and said, "I'll take you to her house. Think her dad still lives in the same place."

Dawn whispered once Buffy had left to get ready to go, "How does she _do_ that?" The other two just shrugged.

"Yeah, she showed up just yesterday, been in her room asleep for most of the time. She's also been avoiding my cheese enchiladas. They were her favorite. Do you have any idea where she's been? She won't say." Amy's dad sounded worried so Buffy decided to lie to him.

"We had no idea she was missing but she had been crashing at my house last week and left with some of Tara's stuff. Tara was hoping to get it back." He let them into his house and Buffy knocked on Amy's door. "Hey."

Amy looked skittishly from Buffy to Tara. "What are you doing here?"

Buffy sighed and held out her hand, "The stuff you took from my house, I want them back." Amy backed up and after rummaging in her drawers came up with a plain green dress and a crystal. Buffy took them with a smile and gave them to Tara. She began to leave before Amy spoke again.

"Is that it? Not going to explain how I ended up in your house naked, missing years off my life?" Amy sounded shrill.

Buffy turned back and coldly said, "Your own damn fault. If you hadn't been so quick to cast spells willy nilly you wouldn't have gotten stuck like that. Willow has been trying to turn you back all that time, as well as taking care of your rat self. You should be glad she didn't just let you get eaten by the first stray cat that came along. Come on Tara; let's let Amy get settled back into human life." With that Buffy left after thanking Amy's father for his hospitality.

Beaten and bloody, singe marks on various parts of his body, Spike stared defiantly in the face of the ugly yellow eyed demon and said, "Give me what I came here for." He heard a disembodied laugh coming from behind the demon before his chest exploded in pain and the fire of _something_ flashed in his eyes. He screamed a slow, agony filled scream. He grinded his teeth together before succumbing to memory, the memory of all the horrible things he had done for fun.

Drucilla danced in front of him, her eyes alight with the glee of being truly evil. She shimmied forward, caressing his dirt covered shirt as if it was made of the finest silk. He had begun calling himself Spike and taken to wearing peasant's garb. She purred into his ears, "Let's have them all, William." He turned to look into their little faces; they were orphans of the state. No one would miss them.

"Alright, come on you lot. You heard the lady." He let out a roar and laughed as their eyes widened dramatically when seeing his true face. Drucilla smiled encouragingly and said in a stage whisper, "This is who you are, William. My darling Knight."

Not one of them was left alive.

He found himself back in Los Angeles some days later. He didn't feel particularly well at all still and stumbled into Angel's hotel in a state of dreaming wake. Thankfully Angel was there at the time; otherwise one of his junior members probably would have killed him instantly. "This is a bad time, Spike. Tell me now why I shouldn't just let Gunn finish you off." Angel very nearly growled.

He laughed, perhaps a little less than sanely and said in a singsong voice, "Because you wouldn't kill someone with a soul." His hand reached up to clutch his shirt near his dead heart. "It's a bit bruised; actually, all of me is in pain."

Angel called off the dogs and sent Cordelia to get some blood. Spike smiled when she finally brought it back, "Still alive, Cordelia. Good to see you've grown from it."

Cordy gave Angel a look that clearly spoke of her confusion. Angel shook his head and began speaking to him again. "What'd you do, Spike?"

He grinned and said, "I won my soul from a demon sorcerer."

"Did- No, Do you ever think, you idiot? Why would a demon give you a soul? I don't like this, Spike. Maybe I can get Wesley to look up this... Whatever this is." Angel meant to turn away but said one more thing, "You know you are a thorn in my side."

Spike only laughed and finished his lukewarm cup of blood in one gulp. A thin brunette girl kept giving him furtive glances. "And who are you?"

"M-me?" She smiled, it was cute. "I'm Fred. Winifred Burkle."

Gunn glared at him and he smirked, "That your girl or something, mate?" Gunn actually growled a little, imperceptible to the rest of the people in the room. "I'll take that as a yes."

"Charles," Fred said and pulled Gunn's attention away from him. Spike smirked even though, in the past, he would have goaded the man into a fist fight. Of course, in the past, he'd been a bloody idiot about almost everything.

He noticed Cordy was looking at him speculatively. He wondered what that was all about. If memory served she preferred the classy type of guy. "What's the matter, cheerleader?"

Cordelia scoffed and said, "I thought you'd be more like-"

"Angel?" This time it was Spike's turn to scoff. "Don't get me wrong. I'm not happy with what I've done with no regret. In fact, I'm pretty much disgusted with myself. But, I'm not about to wallow in it."

She smiled softly, "Why, there just might be hope for you yet. I know it can't be easy, but I'm glad you aren't going to do something stupid. You won't right?"

"Besides rest up here with you lot? No, I'm feeling much more level headed now. You should have seen me yesterday though. I almost threw myself into the sun." He rolled his eyes and caught sight of a blond he hadn't seen in a very long while in the doorway. "Darla."

She was glowing the way pregnant women do, the setting sun casting a golden halo behind her. She smiled softly, "Wiliam."

He rushed up, still a bit stiff himself with his injuries, and helped her settle on one of the circular couches in Angel's hotel. He looked her up and down, his eyes wide with shock. The others were most likely the same. "Cordy, get Angel, quickly." He said just loud enough to get her to move. Then he began to talk in a softer tone to his grandsire. "How did you... I mean, if you don't mind me asking that is, how are you pregnant?"

She seemed softer somehow, more like a human now. She even smiled like she meant it. "It's been so long William. We aren't the same are we? I think it's safe to say you have a soul now, like Angel. He's the one who made me this way. We made life together. I certainly don't understand the why or how but what is done is done."

He took her hand for a moment. "Darla, this is unbelievable. I mean, I understand the part about Angel... He would be the kind to knock someone up and then leave them," Darla got a bit tight lipped when he said that.

"Actually, he kicked me out. Violently." She looked stung about it still. "No, you're right though. This is unbelievably unlucky on my part. I was enjoying being a vampire again. Murdering shopkeepers and sleazy lawyers. Then I have angry sex with Angel and now I'm as big as a house." She sighed with unrestrained despair. This clearly wasn't the happiest pregnancy.

He wasn't sure what he was supposed to do in this situation, so he did what came naturally to him. He made a joke, "Want me to kill the blighter for ya?"

She leveled him a glare, she'd always been protective of Angel, even after he'd gotten a soul. "No thank you," She said primly, "But I'm starving. Do you have anything to eat here?"

"We got Charlie-boy here." At her suddenly white face he amended, "Or maybe Fred can fetch you something less... fresh."

Fred looked a bit lost about what exactly the vampiress could want to eat. "There's sandwich fixings in the fridge and possibly left over take-out... I'll just stop yammering and get something for you."

Spike bent down and began rubbing Darla's feet. He'd always had a thing for feet. She sighed appreciatively and gave him a pat on the head as reward. Gunn went elsewhere, probably wary of the vampire to human ratio. "So, how is it treating you? I noticed a difference in you too Darla. You share the child's soul and, I guess, it's eating preferences now."

She lolled her blonde head back on the sofa. "It's too human. I feel as if I'm caught in two worlds. And belong to neither. I suppose that's what my Angel has felt for these last few years."

A deep male voice chuckled, "A century is more than a few years, Darla." Angel had finally come back with Wesley and Cordy in tow. Wesley was frowning at Spike cradling Darla's feet. Cordy looked mildly amused at the scene. Angel, he knew, would understand that he couldn't help himself. He vacated his spot on the floor and took up a position leaning against the stair post. He settled into his usual façade of smug indifference, complete with bored expression.

"It's nearly a family reunion. Speaking of which, when's the last you heard from Dru?" Spike said. Angel looked pained, as he usually did whenever Spike said anything.

Wesley spoke, "I don't think we quite have the time for your inane chatter, Spike. Why don't you just leave?" Everyone else seemed to agree with that as they didn't speak up for him and only smiled guiltily or not so guiltily in the case of a few. Spike didn't have to take that from this bunch of misfits, but he doubted Buffy and her gang needed him barging back in like nothing had changed. Everything had, and yet not enough to make a difference where it mattered most.

He pulled himself up from his uncaring slouch and went to the desk, swiping a key. "I'll just take a kip then while you lot talk things over." _To death,_ he thought privately. No one paid him much mind as he left as they'd already begun arguing vehemently for this or that solution. _It's a wonder any of the good guys actually win, must have a higher power on their side._

He stumbled into the right room in a matter of minutes. It was small and decorated in the same manner as the rest of the old hotel. He noticed a television complete with bunny ears on a rolling cart next to a dusty bed. "This'll do. It's not much worse than my crypt." He said as he fell into the bed and promptly shut his eyes for a good, long lie in.


End file.
